QI have been reading your column for years, Dan, and now I’m writing you for the first time to ask for a favor. I met this dude online in December and I felt like we had a good connection. He “dumped” me, though, because he was busy and was going through career shit and lived halfway across the country from me. I think a dude telling you he’s too busy for you is bullshit—because boobs—so I encouraged him to tell me the truth. He insisted he wasn’t shining me on: busyness and career shit and distance were the truth, he said. Now it turns out that I will shortly be moving within easy dating distance of this dude. I still think about this guy a lot. I feel like I could connect with him emotionally and sexually in a really blissful way. He reads your column. Would you be a pal and tell this dude to date me already? —Girl on the Move
So, GOTM, you say you urged him to tell you the truth and he insisted that distance, career, busyness were the real reasons he couldn’t date you. But even if you somehow solved all three problems—moved closer, got him a better job, hired him a personal assistant—odds are good that he still wouldn’t be interested in dating you. So I’m telling him to date you, GOTM, per your request, but I’m going to close by telling you to brace yourself for the “no” that’s probably coming your way.
- Looks that way. And if the genders were reversed—if you were a woman dating a man who didn’t care about your pleasure and only wanted blow jobs and help jacking off—no one would hesitate to tell you that your lover was selfish and that this relationship needed to end.
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